Dear Collins,

Thanks a lot for all the good times you brought to my life. You were amazing and you gave your all to this relationship. I saw your effort and I saw the love you had for me in your eyes each day we were together. It’s unfortunate, but the way life is for some of us, we can’t survive only on love. We need something else.

I’m the firstborn of three children. Mom isn’t doing very much. I have to take care of her myself. I have my other siblings also to take care of. It’s unfortunate to say this, but I can’t do all that surviving only on your love. That’s why I said yes to Kobby. He loves me and with time, I will learn to love him too. For now, he provides my needs. So much so that I’m able to send money home to my mom and buy the things my other siblings need.

Don’t judge me, maybe you would have done the same if you were in my shoes. Stop telling your friends that I’m a gold digger. Remember all the good times we’ve shared and put some respect on my name. Stop spoiling my name. I did what I had to do to survive. Plus Kobby isn’t a bad person? It’s not his fault that I chose him over you. It’s also not his fault that he can provide for me while you cannot. You have love, and I respect you for that. Kobby has love and can take care of me too until I can stand on my own feet. So, see our breakup as a survival mechanism and not as a mere betrayal on my part.

There are so many women in the world, I wouldn’t be your last. You’ll find someone better. You’ll find someone who will understand your need for love and provide just that. You’ll in the end marry someone else and knowing the kind of heart you have, you’ll raise a happy family and have a happy home. Let your future excites you more than you allow your past—our past, to make you sad. And when you pray, say a word on my behalf. I’m not your enemy. I’m just a girl who passed through your life in a season.

Someday when we grow old and grey, this breakup wouldn’t matter. I don’t think it will even make it on the list of your favorite memories. Life is like that. We grow. We make memories today so we can make better memories tomorrow. If you give even half of the love you gave me to your next girl, she’ll stay happy and call you the best thing that happened to her. I challenge you to do that.

Kobby just sent me a message. He’s traveling this weekend so I’ll be free. We can meet if you want to so you tell me whatever is on your heart. You can insult me. You can call me all the names right in my face. You can pour all your venom and unsaid words on me. It could be a perfect moment to have a perfect closure so both of us will leave with a heart that’s empty of hatred, malice and ill intentions, because…because we had an opportunity to pour all out. We spent two years together and I believe we owe each other this much…a perfect closure.

Call me when you read this.

Yours, Annette