What are the criteria for selecting one for the post of a District Chief Executive (DCE) by the NDC government, one may ask? Does it suffice for one to be simply a party cardholder, a party activist, or an acclaimed party radio phone-in serial caller to be appointed a DCE? Or, one must be competent, dynamic, and most importantly, have the required managerial and administrative accoutrement before being nominated and elected for the post of DCE? I can hardly adduce reasons in support of which set of criteria for which the Kumawu Afram Plains DCE was selected. He has not only been sitting on his bloody arse doing practically nothing, but has unfortunately been misconducting himself abhorrently. Before I proceed any further, I should like to question him on one of his misdeeds through the narration of an analogically true story.

On one sunny afternoon at about 4 pm when everyone had returned from their farm, a minor humorous incident occurred in my little village, Asiampa. It is about forty two years ago. The mothers were busy in their kitchens preparing the evening fufu meal. We as the youngsters and children had a habit of playing around until the food was ready before proceeding to our various homes to partake the supper. We either played football or sat on what may be modern day skate boards while being pushed around by others. We called it "Bo-race" (Board race). It was an improvised car of wooden flat board with four small metal wheels underneath it. Anyway, on that fateful evening or afternoon, my little brother, Kwaku Adu who is now alias "Abi le" was about four years old and he was enjoying the game. He would be sat in front of one of the older guys on the "Bo-race" and pushed around. Little as he was, he did really enjoy the ride. It was the turn of one "Daakye", a fair coloured northerner, a farm help (labourer) to one Opanin Kwame Owusu (Kwaa musu) to ride the board. For unexplained reasons, he caused a glitch in the steering while on the board and being pushed hard at full acceleration. He nearly collided into my grandfather, Nana Kwaa Agyei, who was returning from his farm, missing him just by two to five inches. What a co-incidence!. Nana Kwaa Agyei was so infuriated that he grabbed the "Bo-race", and with his well sharpened machete, hacked it into pieces. My four year old brother said the following, "Daakye wo kaa se wo yee sei eye?", to the shock of all, and he started crying. His interrogative statement was, "Daakye, do you think what you did was right?". Everyone around was startled, and wondered how a four year old could say and react the way he did. I am more interested in the interrogative statement made by the four year old boy. It will be referred to in due course as I assess the DCE forensically.

The DCE though educationist as he is, is by far myopic and incompetent at his new post. He has no instituted strategies to move the Kumawu Afram Plains District forward in line with the Atta Mills' NDC government's aspirations for a better Ghana. He has since his assumption of office a year ago been sitting with his arms rigidly folded around his chest, mouth agape and waiting on provision of government funds before initiating any essential development of some sort. It appears it has never crossed his mind to introduce or put into place any forms of modalities to generate internal revenue to execute developmental projects. One is amazed to learn how lackadaisical this DCE is to emulate his other colleagues who in the absence of government subventions have still managed to generate income to carry out minor projects in their areas.

However, the DCE has excelled in one field which is typical of most Ghanaian men. Instead of measuring his competence in the positive realisation of the noble duties of his office, he is rather calibrating his strength and competence against how better, and how many women he beds. He has not only bedded, but hooked the Kumawu NDC Women's Youth Organizer from her boyfriend of over ten years. How can Wofa Kwasi Kra alias Wofa C.K, the said boyfriend come by another woman of about forty years at his present age of about seventy? I am asking this truant, selfish, callous and incompetent DCE, "DCE, wo kaa se wo yee sei eye?". Wofa C.K has been so depressed since the lady after tasting that strong "Moses 'abaa" hanging loosely in-between the midget DCE's two legs, would have nothing more to do with him (Wofa C.K), asmiserable as he is. .. I would like to be around in Ghana at the funeral of Brother Yaw Opoku, to observe how Wofa C.K will weep his nephew. His wailing may not only be for the loss of his nephew but how painfully he misses his runaway or wayward lover.

As if that was not enough, the DCE is on record to have had affair with someones wife. He had engaged in immoral sexual activities with the sister of his landlord. This lady is married to a guy from the village who is currently hustling in the USA. Information reaching me indicates that the "American burger" has since divorced the woman all because of her illicit sexual gratifications with the DCE. This is how good or bad the DCE is. He should be ready to bear the consequences of his deplorable acts in the near future.

I am more concerned about how best he can move the newly created district forward than worrying myself about his personal immoral acts. "The evil that men do lives after them". Those he has offended may deal with him appropriately in due course, I will greatly advise that he consults with the Member of Parliament for the area to plan how best the area can be developed. He should not childishly presume that the MP will not grant him audience because they don't have the same political affiliation or doctrines. It is about the development of the district but not the advancement of particular political ideologies or philosophies. Has he ever thought of contacting the Finance and Economic Minister of Ghana who also hails from the area to hold some discussions about the welfare of the area? No. This goes to explain how incompetent the DCE is. No wonder he is friends with the queen of Kumawu and the Kontihene. The DCE should note that time is running out against him on his slow-pace plans to develop the area. Or, is he seconding and sharing President Mills' philosophy of "Slow but sure" policy to realising his dreams of better Ghana? He was not offered the position to only come to draw his salary but to develop the area. Should he continue to fail in his task as it is currently the case, then he had better tender in his resignation. He had better jump before he is pushed, a sure scenario to occur should he continue to persist in incompetence. .

I will suggest he consults with the MP and the Minister on the way forward to developing the district. He should seek expert’s opinion about how best to generate internal revenue to carry out projects rather than to continue waiting hopelessly on funds from the cash-strapped NDC government. He should rather go after single ladies instead of married or seriously engaged women. A word to the wise is enough. The fly that has no-one to advise it follows the corpse into the grave. Luckily, I have advised you. The good citizens of the Kumawu Afram Plains District will not sit down whilst you toy with their welfare. You are warned. But never see it as, “To be forewarned is to be forearmed”. Running to a fetish priest or a Man of God whilst still deeply indulged in your acts of incompetence and repugnance cannot save you from the wrath of the inhabitants when the knell tolls.

Finally,it must be noted that the DCE by his untoward behaviour has tarnished his reputation almost beyond repair. He has left a permanent scar in the minds of people about how dangerous he is when nearer to, or when socialising or interacting with people’s wives. The onus is now upon him to convince those already offended by his disgusting womanising to see him differently than he is already perceived by many today. This reminds me of a true story that once took place in London involving one Radio DJ popularly called DJ “DO THE DO”.This guy as naive, intellectually challenged, and morally rotten as he was, did deceive himself by parochial perceptions. He thought he was popular and famous and therefore had the absolute right and audacity to snatch women from their husbands as done by many Ghanaian lowlifes. He is now walking in the streets of London a disgraced nonentity. He always looks over his shoulder when outside, ensuring no-one is around to injure him or slap from behind. This goes to prove the veracity of the adage, "The wicked person scuttles without being chased". Is it how the DCE wants his life to be?

“Wofa C.K., damirifa due, due ne amane hunu”

Rockson Adofo