"At the just-ended Cabinet retreat at the Kofi Annan International Peacekeeping Centre, the President, Prof. J. E.A. Mills emphasised that the priority of his administration was to ensure that the economy expanded for more jobs to be created for Ghanaians, especially the youth."

President Mills, don't worry about creating jobs for the youth, you've already created enough jobs, 1.6 million of them. These jobs can be had without filling a long application with strigent qualification. All you need is to be an NDC member with names difficult to pronounce. First names like Prosper, Edem and Wisdom are an advantage. These jobs are:

1. DEMONSTRATING JOBS-800,000: -Qualification: Young men and women with NDC destructive background able to consume a jorum of Akpeteshie and apio and strong hands to hurl shitbombs. Send Appliication to the Castle. Application deadline, December 30th 2012

2.SEZING TOILET JOBS. 100,000- . Qualification. NDC background and ability to wield cutlass and other destructive missiles. Application should be sent and addressed to Koku Anyidoho at the Castle not later than December 30th, 2012

3.SEIZING NHIS, NYEP offices JOBS-100,000 Qualification. This is the creme of the crop jobs so one should have at least a Middle School Leaving Certificate or a letter of drop-out from their JSS Headmaster. Application deadline: 12/30?2010

4.CAR STEALING JOBS-100,000. Must be an NDC registered member with an ability to drive and a Passport to drive across Ghana-Togo border. Contact Alex Segbefia at the Castle or phone Carl Wilson at his hideout, 024911-CAR JOBS. Application deadline: Till NDC is voted out of office.

5.SETTING FIRE JOBS-100,000 Must be as smart as a fox to elude authorities. Able to tell petrol from kerosene. Mostly night work with darkness as a companion. Training can be provided at Rawlings School of Torching buildings. Contact Murderer Rawlings or Yaa Beauty, aka Akwele Wang Yu, aka Yaa Konadu Agyeman Rawlings. Application deadline. ONGOING. Pays really good. Steal house contents before burning house.

6.RAPING&ARMED ROBBERY JOBS-200,000 Qualification- Young men with NDC background, ability to go many rounds with young women after robbing houses. Older men can be accepted if they can take Viagra or Cialis in large quantities. Contact Captain Mfodjoh of NDC at Parliament house or send your Application to Alan Bagbin or Doe Adjaho at Parliament house. You can also contact Alan Bagbin during Cabinet meetings Pays really well 'sexing' young women and keeping everything you can steal.

7.COCOA SMUGGLING JOBS-100,000 Qualifications- Must be an NDC member with working knowledge about Aflao. Citizens of Aflao are encouraged to apply. Knowledge of Togo languages are an advantage. Contact Alex Segbefia at the Castle or beaver teeth Ablakwa Okudzeto at the Information Ministry. Ability to earn depends on how much cocoa sacks you can haul on your back.

8.SEIZING MCE'S AND DCE'S-50,000 Qualification. SEE QUALIFICATIONS FOR Toilet seizing jobs. Send application to the Mr Newman at the Castle.

9.SEIZING LORRY PARK JOBS-25,000 SEE QUALIFICATIONS FOR Toilet seizing jobs. Send application to the Mr Newman at the Castle.

10.ADOMI BRIDGE TOLLING BOOTH JOBS-25,000 Qualification. Must be an NDC registered member from Asuogyaman constituency in Eastern Region. No qualification needed as long as you can breath and remember what your name is. You must have a cargo pants with a lot of pockets to hide a load of coins. FOR ADOMI BRDIGE JOBS, CONTACY LOVEJOY DUSI, Chairman of NDC Asuogyaman Constituency.

"Thursday, 15 April 2010 Chairman of the ruling National Democratic Congress (NDC) in the Asuogyaman constituency of the Eastern region, Love Joy Dusi, together with some of his executive members and NDC youth in the area, yesterday took over the toll booths at the popular Adomi Bridge at Atimpoku in a military fashion.

When DAILY GUIDE spoke to the constituency chairman, he said it was the district assembly which was taking over the running of the toll booths and as the chairman of the sub-committee on finance and administration at the assembly, he organized about 20 men from his party to take over. “We did not use any force. We just told the operators to leave the place because they are thieves and cannot be trusted,” According to him, the people working there were causing serious financial loss to the NDC government and needed to be booted out. “Monies being collected here are going into private pockets and we will not sit down to allow this to continue. The bridge is weak and the NDC government needs money to rehabilitate it so we are taking over to manage it properly”.

This is what we call job creation. You throw legitimate well qualified employees to the street and let your illiterate armed robbing Party foot soldiers to line their pockets with state money and it is called job creation, NDC style. Folks, we need to pray hard for 2012 to come and boot these armed robbers from office before they dismantle the country beyond repairs.

Justice Sarpong

Houston, Texas.