Opinions of Wednesday, 15 June 2016

Columnist: Isaac Bisilki

Defilement, any lessons for men?

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Hold it a bit or risk being jailed. This seems to be the strongest message from the disturbing trend of defilement cases at the Sekondi Central Prison, where defilement placed fourth on the chart of crimes recorded in 2015.

But the situation is not just a matter in only the Western Region. Figures available at the national level in 2014, for instance, indicate that defilement cases recorded stood at 4.9 per cent, placing fifth nationally.

Love relationship with young females often poses a huge threat to their male partners, especially in situations where the exact age of the female is not painstakingly verified by the suitor. Men must learn to either hold their ‘pendulum’ or insure themselves, by exercising the highest precaution possible.

Men who have been trapped in this web either blame their predicaments on inaccurate age information supplied by their female partners or the connivance of aggrieved parents to ‘pay them back’ for reaping where they have not sown.

Thorny side of love

Love, it is said, is the sweetest adventure if found and experienced with the right person. But the stories of many men in the prisons, who have felt the thorny side of it, forewarn the rest of us. I do not intend to sound quixotic by entirely faulting the male victims, since exceptions exist in some occurrences. My word of caution is in sync with Chinua Achebe’s statement that: “A patient penis will certainly eat the bearded meat,” and perhaps it is the ideal advice to all males.

More homework needed

Once the uncertainty of getting gripped in the strong arms of the law is very high in this adventure, more homework needs to be done before making a move. While admitting the impetuous influence of the fever of love or infatuation on men and women alike, nurturing the tact of patience and the will to check the age of a prospective female partner clears one of the potential dangers.

The fact is that the physical appearance of a female can be deceptive: one’s judgement may not reflect the true age and feminist power bestowed on her by the creator. As it is said, ‘until you taste the wine of a palm tree, never limit its glory to the fruits it bears’.

Different age groups of men, ranging from 18 to 80, are in prisons for “drawing water, a major necessity of life, from the wrong well.” The spate of defilement is incredible; one wonders if the wise saying that when birds devise new methods of flying to shun danger, hunters should also up their game, has fast eluded the attention of some men.

How old are you?

The question then is, will it be prudent to demand the birth certificate or other means of proof of age before dating a lady? Well, your guess may be as unpopular and unwelcomed as mine. Diving into the game of seeking to siphon what may turn out to be illicit with ruining consequences and responsibly positioning oneself against the odds, which is better?

What should serve as a warning notice to all is that, one may be short-changed for mutual pleasures shared. Naturally, there is not a stimulus without a response. A male may lose out on many so-called opportunities for treading cautiously in this exhilarating but slippery path. But most men will confess that it pays off to treat a mosquito on your balls with respect.

The fact remains that the young men will definitely have to swing the pendulum with caution, having regard to the harshness of the punishment the offence attracts.

Isaac Bisilki is an Assistant Superintendent of Prisons at the Sekondi Central Prison.

Writer’s E-mail: bisilkibaba@gmail.com