Opinions of Friday, 1 July 2016

Columnist: Counselor Frank Adofoli

Every husband needs a ‘girlfriend’ - Counsellor Adofoli

Counsellor Frank Adofoli Counsellor Frank Adofoli

Yes, every husband needs a girlfriend, not another woman but the girl part of the wife he once fell in love with.

You may buy a new lock made of steel, with its keys. The key doesn’t spoil the lock nor vice versa but over the years, the environment and factors such as dirt, rain, change in weather, etc may cause the lock to rust. So its important to oil and maintain it.

A similar fate occurs in our relationships. You get married to that young, fun, adventurous girlfriend. As time goes on, most ladies assume that once they earn the title of a wife, no more work is required. It even gets worse when she starts bearing children.

That thought is a lie, Marriage is work dear. You will need to work on your marriage. Remember the things he first fell in love with, things about you that captured his heart and attracted him like a magnet; what did this man see in you?

Are you still doing those things, how is the fun in the marriage? What is he complaining about? Do you see him chatting with other ladies, trying to look elsewhere? It’s time to work on yourself. Your husband is wrong to look elsewhere, and you have the power to keep him home.

Exercise regularly, lose the excess weight and eat healthy. Inside beauty is not enough, external beauty is important, maintain what God gave you. Don't let marriage makes you look older than your age.

Dirt and uncleanliness is a common killer of intimacy in marriage. Some wives are too lazy to keep their surroundings organized and clean.

The presence of children in your marriage should not kill your romance or intimacy. Remember how many times you bath a day when you were going on a date? how fresh and clean you looked?. If you can keep your home and yourself like that, you will bring back the intimacy.

When was the last time you sent that cute sms? When was the last time you had that candle light dinner? When was last time you appreciated your partner’s efforts? How is your sex life? Most couples crave for sex when dating but turn their bedroom into courtroom when married, it’s time to go back!

Don’t let your actions part God’s union as Matthew 19:6 (ESV) cautions "So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”

Please share with your friends, someone out there needs this.