"Our Father in Heaven, Hallowed be Your name"

It is said, "Any man can be a FATHER, but it takes a special person to be a DAD."

Just substituting the word Father with the word Dad?

I have published some crucial articles before on "fatherhood" to reflect such occasion and had questioned: 'Where Are the Fathers?' In this piece, I proclaim: 'Let the Fathers be Fathers!'

I have been inspired to write this short discourse by the fruitful discussions I had with fathers who attended a forum on the role of fathers in parenting organized by the Toronto Ghanaian SDA Church Men's Ministry on May 14, 2011 at which I was the main speaker.

At the forum, some serious detractions to successful parenting by fathers among others were brought to the fore. These include unsupportive attitude towards fathers by some mothers and the overtly out-of-Ghanaian cultural values cum 'I don't care-ism' of some children towards their fathers, especially in the western world (termed free societies)! Anyway, these should not take away the focus of fathers to be the good fathers they ought to be.

Fathers and Families:
Unfortunately, families nowadays are so busy and burdened that each person (father, mother and child) ends up going his/her own way. When do families spend quality time together? Father hooked to the TV or the computer; mother on the phone and child left with video games!

Fathers, undoubtedly, are the heads of the families, (my apologies to single mothers whose roles are equal to that of fathers and even beyond). This does not mean that fathers have the right to boss everyone around! As rightly pointed out, 'being the head of a family is about being a leader not a dictator.

Self-discipline is the key to good 'fatherhood'! For, 'if a father is a good and just person and treats everyone with respect, then his children will learn more when he says you must show respect to each person you meet.

As a teacher, it is sad to note that some students hate talking about their fathers because there is NO RELATIONSHIP between them and their biological fathers. Some student will simply tell you, 'I have no father' or 'forget about my father!'

Do we as fathers know our role in parenting?

Fathers' Role in Parenting:

So much have been said and written about the role of the father in parenting. Prominent among the discussion include;

a) The father as a role model- Fathers are the first role models to their children whether they realize it or not. For example, a girl who spends time with a loving father grows up knowing she deserves to be treated with respect by boys. Sons also learn their first important lessons in life from their fathers.

b) Fathers must spend quality time their children- Children feel neglected when their fathers appear always too busy to have time for them. Spending time with your kids at sporting activities and on tours bring fathers more closer to their children.

c) Fathers must respect their children's mother- That is one of the best things a father can do for his children. Even if you are no longer married to your children's mother, it is still important to respect and support the mother of your children. By so doing your children are more likely to feel that they are also accepted and respected.

d) Last but not the least; fathers must discipline their children with love!

Fathers need the unflinching support of their wives or mothers of their children in their role in parenting. Let the fathers be fathers!

All said and done, there are many ways to become a better father, please go to A-Better-Child.org for more.

By Joe Kingsley Eyiah, OCT, Brookview Middle School, Toronto