Opinions of Monday, 16 December 2013

Columnist: Anum, Tony

When we boast of this kind of “intellectuals”

In response to my call on him to tone down and add some civility to his contributions to discourse here on Ghanaweb, Kwame Okoampa-Ahoofe Jr., Ph.D gave me some very “apt” descriptions including claiming to have flirted with my mother in the bush. (Check: http://www.ghanaweb.com/GhanaHomePage/features/artikel.php?ID=285095)
Was I offended? No! In fact, he ended up eliminating part of my ignorance. For instance, until he boasted about it, I did not know sleeping with a woman in the bush is something any sane man could do, and even boast about it. Wow! I feel quite unfortunate not to be among those young ones he is impacting his ‘wisdom’ and or “logic” to.
Even more unfortunately, unlike him, I was not raised by some Presbyterian clergymen at his hard-to-reach hometown of Akyem Nkoroso. And because my education and even common-sense taught me a different interpretation of the words “responsible journalism”, I did not know it meant levelling unfounded allegations against people on a daily basis; bashing people left, right, centre; christening them with derogatory names and descriptions; and most importantly, not suggesting any workable solution to the problems facing my Ghana.
So, I felt so sad when I saw this comment under one of his articles: “I pray your descendants are spared your kind of reasoning; ask anyone; instinctively, it is not the kind of mind-set we need to Move Ghana Forward”. How? Why?
COMIC RELIEF: Look, this man is another great achieving Akyem citizen who, to use his own words, is also probably being “under-recognised” (like Dr J.B. Danquah, Gen. Kutu Acheampong and recently, Mad. Theodosia Okoh) by Ghanaians. WARNING: if Ghana continues under-recognising these “great-achieving Akyems who would not be slighted, disdained and denied justice and fair play”, then “Okyeman must [really] secede!!!” That makes perfect sense! That’s Okoampa-Ahoofe for you, with his funny secession theories!
Now let’s get serious again: Comparing his exceptional thinking and analytical abilities to others in his league like Akadu Ntiriwa Mensema, Margaret Jackson and the almighty Rockson Adofo, it is obvious Kwame Okoampa-Ahoofe is the best Ph.D Ghana can boast of. This man deserves one of those 50-Cent chains Pres. Kufuor said great-achieving Ghanaians should be awarded with. Why was he not given one of those? The fact that he has been “sojourning” in the US, probably courtesy some scholarship, since the early 1980s should not be a hindrance at all.
Why don’t we make him the president of Ghana? Huh? With his superb reasoning skills and excellent problem-solving capabilities, he would clean this country of all the dirt, the mess and the “since-Adam”-corruption! Akyems would assume the title: “Real Ghanaians”, and Akyem Nkoroso would become the national capital. Ashantis would probably become second-class or fourth-class Ghanaians, depending on who his children get married to. As for Ewes, Gas, Fantes, Krobos, Northerners and others such as Bonos like Akadu Mensema, because they are all “fake”, they would take their rightful position: third-class Ghanaians!
I know he is a grown up man; he grows a white beard! So I do not see why someone should tell him to “grow up” just because of his manner of writing. How can anyone claim the rants in his articles usually make very little sense? An associate professor of journalism? Someone who teaches creative writing? The son, son-in-law, cousin or some form of a relative of Dr J.B. Danquah, “the doyen of Ghana politics”? And who is that ignoramus who claimed his name-calling attitude is so appalling? Does “Okoampa-the-disgrace-Ahoofe” sound uncool to you?
We should be congratulating this prolific “writer” for posting all those thousand or so “articles” here on Ghanaweb (not because this is the only forum on which such kind of intelligence can be tolerated). Even if someone claims his “articles” put him across as a political dogma, or a racist and an egomaniac, I would beg to differ. Even if another claims his “articles” have given him quite a bad reputation causing many readers to wonder the kind of lessons he teach his students, I would still beg to differ. This is a man who proved to me that his “superb” sense of reasoning coupled with his winding and crisscrossing style of narration makes him a very accomplished creative writer! We should be giving this man a loud clap!
That was why I was surprised when I read the comments his students made about him at ratemyprofessors.com: “… this man made me laugh, his class is a joke…” or this one: “…whatever u say is wrong...he is always right!” Why should anyone give this legendary “Ph.D” 2.7 out of 5 overall quality rating? That is like a grade D! No! This is wrong! This man, I am sure, is the best “Ph.D” in the USA!
Give to Caesar what belongs to him. Let us all hail the man Kwame Okoampa-Ahoofe Jr. Ph.D, the peak of tribal and political intolerance, the loud-mouthed Akyem sensationalist whose proficiency at bashing people is incomparable! Hurray! You have done well, man; you are a living legend! In fact, you are the best “Ph.D” in the world! Go on and “akanise” Ghana! We’ll be behind you (not gay-wise though, knowing very well how sexually active you are and that you support gays; you might read a different meaning into that).
Sorry for the late reply; I don’t have enough time like you do; a situation which enables you to write an “article” per day for Ghanaweb. What’s that you’ve been writing lately titled “My Madiba Moment”? Most readers would agree with me that Madiba would never ever want to be associated with “intellectuals” of your kind. So please, don’t smear the man’s dignity by associating yourself with him. We know your character quite well enough. This is nothing personal; I’m sure you know what they say: respect is earned. You,… umm…, as far as I’m concerned, you don’t deserve any. That’s why I’m talking to you like this. So please, do not boast of a probable bestiality the next time. Like your acknowledged bush-sex escapades, it is not a nice act; even it was a joke, it still isn’t a cool one!

Tony Anum
KNUST, Kumasi
December 15, 2013